Sunday, November 1, 2009

Every middle-aged Chucks addict should have an enabling 20-year-old Facebook buddy.


Sarah to Jonathan (with Chucks image): Hey Jonathan, I need to buy these, right? As soon as my Amex cycle clears...

Jonathan to Sarah: HOT. WANT.

(10 days later…)

Sarah to Jonathan: waaaahhhh - last week I experimentally had 4 pairs in my Converse cart. When like a good girl (ha) I pared it down to 4 I accidentally deleted the Lips pair instead of the boring blue-green deck shoes. Imagine my disappointment when the boring deck shoes arrived! I do not have unlimited funds - yes I reordered and will return The Boring but mad at myself $$$.

Sarah to Jonathan: And the moral is - next time buy all 4 pairs?

Jonathan to Sarah: Exactly!

(few days later)

Sarah to Jonathan: I need sympathy - dragged my tired butt to Office Depot after long week to return the ugly Chucks I ordered by mistake...after 30 minutes it was realized by all parties that my local Office Depot does not have toner for their UPS printer (...yes so ironic I pretty much lack words for it). I can come back on Monday...or Tuesday...no guarantees they can print a label even then...or drive farther or pay more to ship back the damn shoes. I'm sure the post office is cheaper but there is no convenient post office anywhere in my future. I know the Overspending God hates me. But this scenario he has smote me with will only encourage me to keep the shoes to avoid more hassle and paying $13 in shipping. Why oh why doesn't Converse offer free returns - oh, because they make a fortune off lazy guilty people like me?

Jonathan to Sarah: Dude. That sucks. I completely sympathize. No one should have to be forced to wear ugly shoes (ESPECIALLY ugly Chucks!) My sympathies all around.

(next day)

Sarah to Jonathan: This morning tried again to return UglyChucks - a man with no bottom teeth (a couple of bloody stumps) at the Office Max said they ship Fedex which is always more expensive than UPS - I made him give me an estimate anyway - 20 flippin' dollars. ...He directed me to walk around the corner to a UPS store - farther walk than he said plus I forgot where I had parked my car and the day was heating up... Waited in line, again, but shipped off the damn things for $12.90 - done - tired and fussy from 10 errands - feel punished now. Not so punished I won't buy more though. I am tough like that.

Jonathan to Sarah: You are a trouper!

***

I won’t post an image of the Boring/Ugly Chucks because the online pic looks much cuter than the shoes did! A Master Card credit did finally go through for the darn things. And the Lips Chucks look fabulous in my shoe closet! No I have not worn them yet – what’s important is that I have them. Jonathan would understand.

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